cape fear

There’s a thousand words spinning inside

so much to say, so much to keep at bay

trying so desperately to not make it about me

to realise it’s new, and some parts of the old still linger..

and it’s not up to me what you do with them.

Or is it?

I can’t fight an imaginary character,

because in my mind she’s more than me

and if she’s here then

i’m not enough.

But let’s turn the tables,

my mind needs to find the silver lining,

if silver is indeed a colour.

Because in all honesty,

if she was enough,

you wouldn’t be here.

I’m learning, it’s been such smooth sailing,

I know me when i’m with me.

but you

you’re a gale force, a whirlwind

i’ve found myself off course,

yet still managing to adjust my sails

every time brings more knowledge,

more skill,

more hope that this time,

i’ll make it past the rocks

the treacherous cliffs,

into a land where I can put my feet up,

and just love.